Quick post

Facebook. A wonderful connecting resource, but at the same time, so much more information than a person may want to know!

The only way I can keep in touch with lover is through Facebook. I really don't want to know too much, I start getting jealous and uncomfortable. There's a woman there, her photo is very sexy. I will bet she's one of his women. I don't know if he still sees anyone from that time on the sex site but I really don't want to know. My stomach really hurts when I look to see how he's doing.
Well, stop looking, right? I'm trying. Oh my goodness, though, if he's had her why is he sleeping with me? I'm nothing, really I'm nothing. Compared to these sexy, long legged beauties I'm a lump of clay. I feel sick.
I had this feeling with my soul twin, too. One particular woman who I felt in extreme competition with. She posted a mostly naked photo of herself there and he wrote a response- something like "who is missing in this photo." It killed me. I think I decided to block him after that.
Oh but now I'm older and my body isn't the way it used to be. Old and used and in my depressed moods, I think about just disappearing. Its going to end and Im frightened. God, he only just turned 30!!! I'm so scared and I'm can't quite place my finger on it...