The assault continues...

And the assault continues. Yesterday, I found a huge package on my doorstep, FedEx. I assumed it was just the monthly shipment of diapers and wipes, and I left it outside. This morning, however, I flipped it over and glanced at the return address. My father. And this one was addressed to me. I was, frankly, stunned. I mean, what the hell? What the HELL is going on?? Dh has a theory--that he expected me to come running back after a while, all full of apologies, ready to give in and offer to give myself away yet again. And I haven't. It's been over a year, and I haven't budged. I have stuck to my principles and self-worth, and it's driving him crazy....hence the assault, comprised of trying to insult me through gifts to my daughter, ad nauseaum. And now this.

I believe he's right. I don't know what's in that box, and I don't want to touch it. The thought just occurred to me that it might be anything of mine from my childhood that remains in his condo, just to let me know how furious he is with me. I'm going to let DH open that box. If I'm indeed right, fine. If not, I want him to give whatever it is to charity. Our porch storage closet is packed with gifts he has sent to my daughter, just waiting to go to Goodwill. She has enough toys and clothes from people who LOVE her. We are well off, we can afford to buy her toys and books and clothes and we need NOTHING from him. I've waited all my life to get to the point when I can announce that I don't need his money. I DON'T NEED HIS MONEY. EVER. AGAIN.

Fuck you, dad.

And for anyone else who thinks I'm not strong enough to hold out and value my self-worth, fuck you, too.

I have all the protection I need. A husband who would fiercely defend me to the death, emotionally and proudly, and has been military-trained.  And a lover, military-trained, technically proficient, and a Tai Kwan Do black belt. My daughter and I will be JUST fine.