I haven't written about the dysfunctional "stuff" for a while because all has been calm on that front. But today, yet ANOTHER package arrived in the mail, for my daughter, from my "N" father. This time, it was simply a Passover alphabet book. No card, nothing. This is infuriating for two reasons: 1) he is still sending her things when he said he wanted nothing to do with her; and 2) he knows I have been baptized and my family is no longer a Jewish one. Therefore, my conclusion must be that he is trying to manipulate once again. It just comes out of the blue, as usual. And I almost fell for the ploy... hook, line, and sinker. Came so close to responding, but my husband stopped me, thank goodness. He's just trying to get a rise out of me, as my thoughtful husband said. When I stopped being so angry and reactive, I realized he was absolutely right. As we've concluded before, the worst hell for a narcissist is to be ignored. So they create drama. Smart husband. Damn smart.My daughter, almost 14 months now!!, is absolutely thriving. She is HAPPY like I've never seen happy. Loved like I've never seen loved! And is so cute and funny that I am laughing more now than I ever have. She's BEAUTIFUL--a little Irish elf, we call her. Our little Irish elf, for her auburn hair and bright blue eyes and fair complexion. As I've said in wonderment before, umm, where did she come from??? I'm a dark little pixie, a mix of Russian and Mediterranean features... but I gave birth to her, so I know she's mine. LOL DH, though, she's him through and through. His perfect daughter. It's lovely to see them both so happy. It makes my heart melt.
I refuse to let my father manipulate his way into our lives. I have shielded my little girl and it's done wonders. I am a mother tiger, I will never allow anyone to tamper with my little one.
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